Due to the over abundance of insane rain on the Spanish plain as of late, I got to spend all of Friday and the weekend in bed/on the couch with a nasty cold. I don't know what is up with my immune system, but colds seem to hit me harder than the average bear. I rarely get the flu (I think the last time I had the pukey flu was in 8th grade), but my bod seems to compensate its lack of fluishness with miserable colds. I was supposed to go down to Rota (the other base about an hour and change away) on Friday to shadow the nurse there, but the cold had settled in my throat and I was incredibly achy. So, I called in sick to regular work and Rota day and watched episodes of the Chapelle show all day long. "MMM MMMM BITCH! This is the way I talk!" Of course, come to find out a little girl fainted at the school Friday after seeing her own blood. You might say "Well that stinks that you, the esteemed school nurse, weren't there to help her out." To which I reply, "But if it was a lot of blood, they would have then had to revive me as well." So I suppose events unfolded as they should have.
Despite hours of quality couch/sniffling/hacking/sore throat time, I did manage to do SOMETHING this weekend. Me, El, Will, and a few of Will's co-workers all went to the Sevilla/Barcelona soccer, oh excuse me, futbol game last night in downtown Sevilla. For those of you who aren't soccer fans, myself included, Barcelona is the number one team in the Spanish league and has Messi on their team, considered to be the best soccer player IN THE WORLD. Sevilla is ranked in the middle of their division, so it was a pretty anticipated match-up. Needless to say, even nosebleed tickets were uber pricey and hard to come by.
Since the game didn't start until 9pm, and we were all jonesin' for some Americana cuisine, we decided to head into Sevilla early for some TGI Friday's action. The restaurant is right next to the stadium, so it seemed like a silly choice NOT to go there. Like the typical Friday's back in the States, there was a bunch of random crap on the walls (Shenanigans?) and the servers wore wacky hats. Despite the massive state flag of Idaho hanging on the wall, it felt like a sliver of home. Unfortunately, now that Lent has started (or as I call it, "40 day diet"), I must abstain from all things fried and glorious, which is basically 90% of Friday's menu. Out of the 7 options on the appetizer samplers that we all split as a group, I was able to eat one item. You might say, "Fast track to weight loss! Great job!" Instead, I split a "Pie in the sky" cookie dessert w/ ice cream, chocolate sauce, and whipped cream. I should have given up being a lard ass.
After paying our tab, we made our way (you know, across the street) to the stadium. We checked out the official team store before the game, and the prices weren't all that bad. They were even having a BOGO sale, which is unheard of in the overpriced realm of team stores. Elliot and Will got matching jackets since they were BOGO, so they will forever look precious when we attend future Sevilla futbol games.
There isn't any alcohol allowed in the stadium (despite the non-alky beer they sell), and once you get inside you understand why. The atmosphere is just electric. Even if you're not a soccer fan, you can't help but be impressed by the electricity and stamina of the crowd. Almost the entire stadium was singing or clapping the entire game. No pauses except to call the ref a son of a bitch. People were also waving flags and scarves throughout the match. Even though I had no idea what was going on, I was still clapping and cheering with the crowd. It's very easy to get swept away in the atmosphere. The excitement coupled with booze paired with very narrow ledges = catastrophes waiting to happen. Hence, no booze served at the games. Just getting to your seats was kind of nerve-racking, as there was very little foot room making it very difficult to get passed people to your seat. It was very much like the Old Chicago Stadium circa 1991, minus the cigarette smoke. Wait, it's Europe, so scratch that, the cigarette smoke was there.
I can't really tell you much about the game itself, because me explaining soccer is like Michael Jordan trying to play baseball. Wait.... All I know is Sevilla played awful in the first half but were like a different team in the second half of the game; they actually made the game pretty dang exciting and almost won. The game ending in a 1-1 draw, which was better than people had expected Sevilla to perform. Maybe I'm a good luck charm? Or maybe it was because Messi was hurt towards the end of the first period and didn't seem quite himself the rest of the game. Either way, it was still fun to watch.
RANDOM SPANISH OBSERVATIONS, Futbol edition:
-Instead of booing, people whistle
-Soccer fans show their team pride by wearing the team scarves
-Faux hawks are huge here. Ok, that's not soccer related, but I noticed it while at the game
-Some of the soccer chants are based off American folk songs. I heard Spanish songs to the tune of Yankee Doodle and My Darlin' Clementine
On account of my glorious cold and not getting home until around midnight last night, I had one of my signature lost voices today. For those of you fortunate enough to communicate with me via an Ugly Mug napkin when I have these spells, you know that I sound like I just chugged a bottle of whiskey and broke a pool cue over someone's head. Normally, this wouldn't be a big deal. Today was a different story.
About a week ago, Elliot was asked if I would like to accompany the Shirt's wife (the Shirt is a nickname for the First Shirt ranking) and the Spanish Host Nation Liaison to lunch with a visiting 4-Star general's wife. I would like to assume that I was asked because of my wit and charm, but reality suggests that it was because of lack of options. Since the commander's wife has already left, I was basically left. I didn't have PE today, and I was assuming no one would pass out at the sight of their own blood, so I agreed to join. In fact, I was honored to be asked.
For those of you who have experienced this type of visit at a military base, it is a really big deal. Everyone stresses over the smallest detail, and people are walking on pins and needles to make sure every second of the visit is perfect. The Host Nation Liaison gets the wives (the General of USAFE's wife and the Chief of USAFE's wife) little gifts, everyone lines up in order to greet the arriving flight, every nano-second of the visit is planned, you get the picture. Even though we're a tiny base, we still want to make a good impression on visiting commanders. And someone though it was wise to plop me in that equation.... Basically, I was told that Autumn (the shirt's wife) and I would take the ladies around the base, . We would meet with a few other ladies at the different stops and ultimately have lunch at the bowling alley (it doesn't sound that fancy, but they actually have really good food). It's a lot of pomp, politic, smiling, oooing and ahhing at the wives' stories, etc.
I had zero clue what the day was to entail, except that I was to be at Alicia's office by 9. I had no clue what to wear, so I tried to picture a general's wife in my mind and what she'd be wearing. I conjured up an image of an old Texas beauty queen, so I decided to wear my short black dress, funky teal jewelry, and flats. I also curled my hair and wore it in a side ponytail, to which Autumn said I looked like I was from that "Birth of Venus" painting. I wish.
The weather here has been rainy and gross the past few days, and today was no exception. Despite the rain, we all drove out to the runway to meet the arriving flight. The women had Dirty South as our driver, much to my amusement, and there was a cooler of water, Diet Coke, Coke, and York Peppermint patties (since they were told the general's wife likes them). I told you no detail was spared.
The general's wife was pretty much what you'd expect: thin, great hair, perky, very put together and mannered, and a great schmoozer. She was very nice and seemed very down to Earth, which Elliot explained to me is actually pretty rare. She is also a personal trainer, nutritionist and certified yoga instructor. She asked us all a lot of questions about where we were from and life on base. When she found out I was from Chicago, she said that she'd only been there once and that it was "very cold". Clearly she didn't have any pizza or go to a White Sox game, b/c then she would be singing Chi-town's praises.
The Chief's wife was also very nice and cracked me up with how she wanted to get pictures of everything. You could also tell she had a dry sense of humor, which I always appreciate.
After we picked them up, we went over to the school and gave them a tour w/ the Principal and School Liaison Officer, Darla. The kids were super cute and showed the general's wife how they use the SmartBoard, which she got a kick out of. Overall, they seemed impressed with the school, and we all walked through the hallways with smiles plastered on our faces.
After the school tour, we went to the movie theater on base where the General and Chief gave a power point presentation and answered questions. Like his wife, the General wasn't pretentious in the least and was very humble. He kept thanking everyone in the audience, and despite a few moments of military hokiness, gave a nice and informative talk. He was talking about military pride, and both his father and grandfather were awarded silver stars (amongst other honors), and his father was nominated for the Congressional Medal of Honor. Pretty. Dang. Impressive. He's only in his mid 50s, so it's even more impressive that he's already a 4-star general. Like I said, very personable guy, so I'm sure that helps boost people through the ranks to an extent. It is the military, after all, and they do love their pomp and ceremony.
After the talk, we headed to the bowling alley and had a pretty nice little lunch: salad with cranberry vinaigrette, olives, rolls (which I couldn't touch since I also gave up Spanish bread), this German potato salad (an odd choice, but good), turkey sandwiches on toasted bread with cheese, arugula, tomato, and cucumber, and a fruit salad with blueberry yogurt. The fruit had a ton of strawberries and mango in it, and it was absolutely delicious. I am planning on recreating it at home in the near future. Lunch was very tasty, but on account of my voice, I really didn't talk much. I apologized for sounding like Joan Jett at the get-go (no, I didn't actually say that), but I still felt self-conscious trying to wheeze in an anecdote. Regardless, both the wives gave me a hug goodbye, and the general's wife said "Love your wife" to Elliot when she met him. I couldn't have messed up Moron's future that badly then, right?
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