I'm not so cliched as to put "I'll be there for youuuuuuuu" as a title of a blog post about love and friendship, but I still need the message to come through. I think anyone who lived through the 90's knows exactly how the theme song to Friends goes, and you're probably singing it in your head as you read. You're welcome. I remember being 10 years old, painfully awkward as most pre-adolescents are, and wanting "The Rachel" haircut. I am SO glad my mom wouldn't let me, because with my thick, wavy hair, I would have looked like a Muppet. You saved me from further awkwardness, madre, and for that you have my eternal gratitude. Although I won't forget that Easter Sunday outfit you made me wear when I was young...
The past two weeks have been incredibly difficult, sad and confusing. The emotions of grief and my subsequent reactions to them have been difficult to process, and the love and support from family, friends and strangers has been truly appreciated. There's no way to predict your emotions when something tragic happens, and I just wanted to take a minute to thank everyone for helping me navigate mine.
Thank you to everyone who called, emailed, texted, messaged on Facebook, sent a carrier pigeon (come to think of it, I didn't actually get a carrier pigeon. Or a smoke signal. Someone rectify that!), prayed, or gave me a strong, caring hug. The number of people whose love I felt the past two weeks is too long a list to name everyone, and that fills me with comfort and happiness.
A big "Muchas gracias" to the sparkly Ramon from Morón, who didn't bat a fabulous eye when I started crying in his salon. Through a fellow customer who spoke English, we shared a moment of sadness. His best friend had passed away two days earlier from leukemia, so he was heartbroken and quietly crying while highlighting my hair. I told him, in my best Spanish, that I was sorry he was sad, and that I had lost a close friend too. He shared pictures with me, and I gave his arm an understanding squeeze. I held it together..... until Alejandro by Lady Gaga came on the radio. "You've gotta be fucking kidding me" I thought to myself. You see, Alejandro always reminds me of Will. When we went down to Granada, I sang, "Don't call my name, don't call my name....ALHAMBRA" practically every 5 minutes, much to Elliot and Will's chagrin. After he PCS'ed, I would still write those lyrics on his wall or message him with those super clever words I came up with. So when I heard the first few seconds of the song in Ramón's salon of wonder (no, he sadly wasn't wearing "License to Blonde"), I started blubbering like a baby. Some old dame getting her hair washed gave me the weirdest look I've ever seen, and I can't say I blame her. I must've been quite the sight. Nothing like seeing some blonde American, wearing a sheet and sporting a head that looks like it could signal alien life, start crying in a Spanish hair salon. If I wasn't so freaking sad at the moment, I may have shared her bewilderment. But the only look I got from Ramón was one of sympathy and understanding, and for that I am thankful.
Thank you to the friends who made me deviled eggs and homemade truffles, and those who offered to come over and help clean my house. Thank you to the friends who let me cuddle their babies. Thank you to the friends who let me cry into their voicemails, and the ones who waited outside their newborn's first doctor's appointment to give me words of comfort. Thank you to the friends who came over the night of Will's funeral to do a shot of his Maker's Mark in his memory. Thank you to those who danced with me at Feria, and to those who shared their cigarettes when the floodgates started opening, and I just "needed a smoke". Thank you to those who didn't judge me when I did. Thank you to the friends who let me talk about Will, and those who made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt ("Really? I thought you were going to say something like Baltimore"). Thank you to my Mom, who reminded me that it was okay to laugh, and that Will would be sad if I wasn't laughing and enjoying life. Thank you to the Noel's, who trusted me to watch their beautiful daughter while they were in Egypt; singing Disney songs with such a sweet little girl lifted my spirits. Thank you to the people I've never met who read my tribute to Will. Thank you to all who continue to push me to pursue writing. Before, I never gave it much stock and thought people were just being nice when they said, "You should really publish your writing!" I think I am going to pursue that now. Thank you to everyone who let me grieve in my own way, and who didn't say things like, "He's in a better place." I always hate when people say that. Thank you to all who understood that I haven't felt this sadness of grief since Gramps died. Thank you to everyone for understanding what Will meant to me and El, and what a joy he was to have in our lives.
Thank you to my Mom, who answered every sad phone call and text, making me feel better every single time. And for sending me a care package to cheer me up. I've already used the Gain laundry booster, and my clothes smell delicious. Thank you to Mimi, who texted me hoping that I had a happy day. Thank you to my Dad, whose perspective on God's hand in life made me appreciate the opportunities for goodness we all have on Earth.
Thank you to my Boo, who felt every emotion with me and will always be my rock.
Thank you to Will Davis, who reminded me that I better still be thinking about him, and that he wants us to enjoy life like he did. On Thursday, I received a package from him. The first words out of my mouth were "Oh my God", and my hands were shaking when I got the package from the Postal worker. I opened it to find the books I had lent Will, including the ones on Henry VIII and Eleanor of Aquitane. The box had a sweet smell to it, and a small note fell out. In his writing, Will wrote,
Courtney,
Thanks for letting me borrow these books. I didn't quite get through all of them because the "Game of Thrones" books distracted me (author's note: I recommended that he read them :). I also included some Oud, which is Saudi incense.
-Will
Thank you to the friends who helped me process my emotions, and for helping me realize what an incredible blessing that package is. It was a typical Will package, full of gratitude and kindness. It comforts me to know that he is still thinking about me in heaven. I will save the note forever, and El and I will light the Oud on special occasions.
Will loved reading my blog, and I can't think of a better way to honor him than by continuing to write posts. I think he's really going to enjoy my next one on Tomatina: "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes".......
The past two weeks have been incredibly difficult, sad and confusing. The emotions of grief and my subsequent reactions to them have been difficult to process, and the love and support from family, friends and strangers has been truly appreciated. There's no way to predict your emotions when something tragic happens, and I just wanted to take a minute to thank everyone for helping me navigate mine.
Thank you to everyone who called, emailed, texted, messaged on Facebook, sent a carrier pigeon (come to think of it, I didn't actually get a carrier pigeon. Or a smoke signal. Someone rectify that!), prayed, or gave me a strong, caring hug. The number of people whose love I felt the past two weeks is too long a list to name everyone, and that fills me with comfort and happiness.
A big "Muchas gracias" to the sparkly Ramon from Morón, who didn't bat a fabulous eye when I started crying in his salon. Through a fellow customer who spoke English, we shared a moment of sadness. His best friend had passed away two days earlier from leukemia, so he was heartbroken and quietly crying while highlighting my hair. I told him, in my best Spanish, that I was sorry he was sad, and that I had lost a close friend too. He shared pictures with me, and I gave his arm an understanding squeeze. I held it together..... until Alejandro by Lady Gaga came on the radio. "You've gotta be fucking kidding me" I thought to myself. You see, Alejandro always reminds me of Will. When we went down to Granada, I sang, "Don't call my name, don't call my name....ALHAMBRA" practically every 5 minutes, much to Elliot and Will's chagrin. After he PCS'ed, I would still write those lyrics on his wall or message him with those super clever words I came up with. So when I heard the first few seconds of the song in Ramón's salon of wonder (no, he sadly wasn't wearing "License to Blonde"), I started blubbering like a baby. Some old dame getting her hair washed gave me the weirdest look I've ever seen, and I can't say I blame her. I must've been quite the sight. Nothing like seeing some blonde American, wearing a sheet and sporting a head that looks like it could signal alien life, start crying in a Spanish hair salon. If I wasn't so freaking sad at the moment, I may have shared her bewilderment. But the only look I got from Ramón was one of sympathy and understanding, and for that I am thankful.
Thank you to the friends who made me deviled eggs and homemade truffles, and those who offered to come over and help clean my house. Thank you to the friends who let me cuddle their babies. Thank you to the friends who let me cry into their voicemails, and the ones who waited outside their newborn's first doctor's appointment to give me words of comfort. Thank you to the friends who came over the night of Will's funeral to do a shot of his Maker's Mark in his memory. Thank you to those who danced with me at Feria, and to those who shared their cigarettes when the floodgates started opening, and I just "needed a smoke". Thank you to those who didn't judge me when I did. Thank you to the friends who let me talk about Will, and those who made me laugh so hard my stomach hurt ("Really? I thought you were going to say something like Baltimore"). Thank you to my Mom, who reminded me that it was okay to laugh, and that Will would be sad if I wasn't laughing and enjoying life. Thank you to the Noel's, who trusted me to watch their beautiful daughter while they were in Egypt; singing Disney songs with such a sweet little girl lifted my spirits. Thank you to the people I've never met who read my tribute to Will. Thank you to all who continue to push me to pursue writing. Before, I never gave it much stock and thought people were just being nice when they said, "You should really publish your writing!" I think I am going to pursue that now. Thank you to everyone who let me grieve in my own way, and who didn't say things like, "He's in a better place." I always hate when people say that. Thank you to all who understood that I haven't felt this sadness of grief since Gramps died. Thank you to everyone for understanding what Will meant to me and El, and what a joy he was to have in our lives.
Thank you to my Mom, who answered every sad phone call and text, making me feel better every single time. And for sending me a care package to cheer me up. I've already used the Gain laundry booster, and my clothes smell delicious. Thank you to Mimi, who texted me hoping that I had a happy day. Thank you to my Dad, whose perspective on God's hand in life made me appreciate the opportunities for goodness we all have on Earth.
Thank you to my Boo, who felt every emotion with me and will always be my rock.
Thank you to Will Davis, who reminded me that I better still be thinking about him, and that he wants us to enjoy life like he did. On Thursday, I received a package from him. The first words out of my mouth were "Oh my God", and my hands were shaking when I got the package from the Postal worker. I opened it to find the books I had lent Will, including the ones on Henry VIII and Eleanor of Aquitane. The box had a sweet smell to it, and a small note fell out. In his writing, Will wrote,
Courtney,
Thanks for letting me borrow these books. I didn't quite get through all of them because the "Game of Thrones" books distracted me (author's note: I recommended that he read them :). I also included some Oud, which is Saudi incense.
-Will
Thank you to the friends who helped me process my emotions, and for helping me realize what an incredible blessing that package is. It was a typical Will package, full of gratitude and kindness. It comforts me to know that he is still thinking about me in heaven. I will save the note forever, and El and I will light the Oud on special occasions.
Will loved reading my blog, and I can't think of a better way to honor him than by continuing to write posts. I think he's really going to enjoy my next one on Tomatina: "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes".......
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